I get asked this a lot on my Twitch stream (unsurprisingly). And recently there was a Serbian Twitch streamer in her 20s, which her whole life ahead of her and so much to be thankful for, who killed herself.
First of all, it is never as bad as you imagine. The reason you think it is so bad might be chemical and you need real help from someone besides me. But I’ve found some things that help me.
Find someone to help.
There is always someone in need of your help. I don’t care how much you personally think you have nothing to offer anyone, you absolutely fucking do. Even if it is just helping someone get their groceries home, or sweeping a sidewalk that you don’t own, or just listening to someone about their day. There is always someone in need of your help. Get busy finding who those people are and it will help you forget about yourself.
Go outside.
I forget to do this all the time. But being outside, looking up at the stars and sky, which are the same for everyone on the planet, is a simple way to find joy. Watch the sunrise or set or stare at the moon and stars and wonder. The sky and nature are always there for you, for everyone. Nature is my temple, and running my worship.
Exercise.
It doesn’t have to be a big production. Go for a run or hike or do some yoga or push ups. I prefer things that don’t build up more anxiety (cross-fit isn’t my thing). I prefer exercise that promotes harmony between me and my body, not that pits me against my body, forcing it into submission. Yoga, martial arts, Tai-Chi, climbing, swimming, are all examples of such exercises.
Force yourself to smile.
There is good science that forcing yourself to smile actually triggers neurologic responses that raise your mood even if there is nothing to smile about. So that children’s song, “turn that frown upside down” is actually scientifically based.
Stay busy with positive distractions.
For me that is coding, streaming, playing music, watching a positive movie, enjoying a good game that isn’t toxic. Some people like to cook or read. Being busy keeps me from thinking about the problem. It is hardest to do this right before bed. That’s when massive anxiety usually strikes me personally. I know its chemical, and try to just read or watch a movie and fade off to sleep instead of letting my mind race.
Find a community.
Humans are social creatures, even the most introverted. Don’t give up on seeking out people with common interests to yours. Twitch is a good place to randomly find them, but there are many other places. Meetups in particular. I prefer things where I can see the faces and hear the people rather than just read because so often just text isn’t enough to avoid people who are very toxic.
List what you are grateful for.
Creating a list, actually writing it down, gives something for your mind to do that is positive. Force yourself to find anything you are happy for, even if all it is is a good blanket or beer or friend. Write that shit down. Read it all the time. There’s a good chance you’ll start to see everything and be like, woah, I have it so good, much better than so many others. Then, go find other people and help them get to have things to be thankful for as well, one of them being knowing you and your help.
Listen to positive music.
I learned the hard way during my massive depression not to listen to Linkin Park and other angry, emotional music. It was very appealing because it matched my feelings (“What I’ve Done” has become the anthem of my divorce and depression, I still can’t listen to it without balling my fucking eyes out). But here’s the thing, I realized that listening to the downer, sad songs was just perpetuating that state in me. I forced myself to only listen to Jack Johnson, Indigo Girls, and other upbeat stuff and, like forcing yourself to smile (I suppose), I automatically got happier. Joseph Campbell once said when asked by Bill Moyers what we humans could possibly do being so dependent on mythology but having lost almost all of it what the next best thing was and Joe said without hesitation, “music”. Music is the closest thing to a universal “religion” that all humanity can easily share.
Watch Linux workers on a Monday going to work.
https://www.instagram.com/p/CawyyDJlFnZ/
You could be living in the Antarctic and have wings but can’t use them to fly. Consider that.
I’m sure I’ll think of more thing later. But these are the main ones off the top of my head.
#depression #twitch #community #tips