I’ve been fighting allergies my whole fucking life. My earliest memory of a hospital is when they rushed me to one because I couldn’t breath. Some sort of childhood Asthma attack. I’ve never gotten the details of what that was or why it happened or how it might be related.
Lately, I’ve been having massive attacks that make my entire body itch and ooze puss from skin sores out of nowhere on occasion. I have random, intense sneezing fits. I’m so distended from inflamed organs I don’t even fit into pants that are two sizes bigger than my normal size. The worst part is that I have no fucking idea what is wrong. I’ve been to doctors and no one can figure it out. I am making an appointment with an allergist, if I can find one. Every time I go to the doctor for this stuff I end up with a lighter wallet and nothing to show for it.
Things I do know:
I’ve very allergic to the dog (and her hair is everywhere). Her hair is short and fine and floats all over. I have found it on my keyboard, phone, sink, kitchen table, everywhere. I don’t think I can live in the house with that dog any longer. But my step-son needs the dog so we will never be getting rid of her. I love her too much as well. But, I just cannot be in the same room as her and live to be 90, not like this.
I’m very allergic to crape-myrtle trees. If I get a good dose of this it will actually shut my airway down. It’s the only time I’ve come close to needing an epipen (which I do no use).
Zyrtec seems to help. But I can never be sure. Then I read that those who use it become even more allergic if they stop taking the pills. Sounds about right.
Flonase has helped in the past. Even though it is a steroid, it does work, at least it did for “hay fever” before I had a dog. It seems to work immediately.
Benadryl works, but just knocks me out. I’m completely useless as a human being when I take it, but it does calm everything down.
Ibuprofen, good to counter inflammation, is also a histamine. This conflict is tough to manage. Sometimes I need some to counter swelling for other reasons, but it also increases what feels like allergic attacks.
I cannot eat mushrooms. I used to love them. Now if I have them I end up feeling like I have to throw them up. They aren’t life threatening, just something I don’t digest well, suddenly.
Getting stressed out makes it worse. When I cannot figure out the cause I get really pissed, which just makes it worse. I’m used to being in control — of my health in particular — and not knowing what the hell is happening is a source of sickness itself because of what it does to my mental health.
This has gotten way worse in this fucking apartment. I’m guessing because of a lot of black mold. The walls were literally filled with water for more than a week when the top floor flooded and I spend 20 hours a day trapped here.